Sunday, May 2, 2010

And the funny thing about being mad is

that it really just masks the sadness and the fear in all things personal and political.

It seems that my life has gotten really dark as the anger has grown to accommodate the sadness about 'what could be but isn't yet' and the fear of 'what could be but isn't yet.' Seems that the only place I have been living is the realm of 'what could be but isn't yet.' Ooops.

Not that I know Melissa Etheridge or Tammy Lynn Michaels, but folks who know me know that, as I prepare to get married, their 'divorce' has been unnerving. I am very sad for their family and for both of them regardless of the details of their split. I wish them both nothing but the best.

In listening to Melissa's new CD, "Fearless Love," I am- as usual with Melissa music- blown away by the lyrics. In thinking about sadness and fear and anger, the song "Only Love" on the new album has really struck a chord. A portion of the lyrics are below:

Everything you feel
That's what your world is made of

And when I take a good look around I see
My thoughts are coming back to me

So look around
We are in charge of our own dreams
We have more power than it seems

So look around
Come on now show me who you're loving
Then show me just who you hate
Then I can show you all your angels
That guard your heaven's gate


Have I been feeling angry and hence thinking that there are only things to "hate" in the world? Check.

Have I been sending out 'angry vibes' and noticing that's what I've been attracting in return? Check.

Could I stop being angry for my present circumstances and, if I really feel that they need to be changed, change them? Check.

Have I been making the world smaller by condemning all the things I'm pretty sure I 'hate'? Check.

Could I make peace with some of these people and things? Check.

Could changing what I can and making peace with what I cannot change possibly improve my life and the lives of others? Check. (Sorry for sounding a bit like 'The Serenity Prayer,' but I have always found it to be somewhat relevant.)

Note to Self: Live peacefully in the land of what is and pursue your dreams.

Love to all (especially those who have been enduring the bouts of anger that have been masking the sadness and the fear), B

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